On our last day of the first week, my children reminded me, that any given moment the day can take a turn, for better or worse.
The morning was rough, but we finally made it out of the house around noon, to shop for Daddy’s birthday. After an unsuccessful trip to Target, Anne asked for a Donald’s visit to slide. I hoped that some play-time at the golden arches would make the next store visit a little more enjoyable. I was wrong!
Anne climbed to the top (something she has done countless times before), where she had a meltdown because she was scared. I asked Beth to help her, and she climbed up there, only to have Anne refuse her help. This caused Beth to meltdown as well, because she cannot handle the crying, but would not leave her sister. I was patient, I was patient, and then I was a jerk. 😦 Eventually she came down (with Beth’s help) and sobbed in my arms. She was tired, and sad that I couldn’t come up and get her. I was angry at myself for being too big to climb up and get her, as she cried for me to do just that. It was a painful reminder, of how far I still have to go on my healthy journey. I was also embarrassed for being a jerk, when my kid was struggling. As I work my program, I have less self-hatred, but when it does rear it’s ugly head, it makes me act like a jerk, and I hate myself even more.
Needless to say after the McDonald’s disaster, we came straight home, and no more shopping was done. While Anne napped, Beth watched a Veggie Tales movie to relax. Then we did our meditation, played some Monkey Wordschool on her kindle, and did laundry.
When Anne got up from her nap, we officially started our school day. First up was art, which today was making daddy’s cards. Following art, we had story-time, then exercised. Since we needed some fun, instead of walking our mile with Leslie, today we danced to TobyMac, while playing follow the leader. After 20 minutes of dancing back-n-forth through the apartment doing all kinds of crazy moves, we were ready to sit down and do some worksheets.
The girls did really well with their worksheets, and did one coloring sheet for our bible study, before finishing with a yoga adventure. Our school time ended at almost 8pm. It was late, but the girls were in a great mood and ended the day on a good note.
It was not our best day, but it also wasn’t our worst. I apologized to my children for my poor behavior, and they gave me the love I needed (and couldn’t give myself today). One Day At A Time, I become the person God intended me to be; thankfully I have Al-Anon and my two amazing kids to help me find my way.
Have a blessed day everyone, and don’t forget to smile. ♥
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